I thought it would be a great idea to write my first blog about the question Why? Why did I decide to write the book “The Second Wives Guide” and why did I start “The Second Wives Head Quarters” Everything we do in life starts with a why? Why do we get out of bed in the morning? Why do we do anything?
For me, my why is crystal clear, I wrote this book, and started this business and opened up this platform, because this information is needed. I believe there is a movement taking place and things are changing. There are not many people I speak to today, that aren’t a second wife, a stepparent, part of a blended family, grew up in one, or know someone who is. So, if more and more people are fitting into these categories, then why isn’t there more and more information and advice out there to help people transition through these somewhat difficult family dynamics.
I can only talk from my own personal experience, about how challenging being a second wife and stepparent was for me. I think I am pretty safe in saying, if I was feeling like that and going through these changes, I know many other people are as well. This is why I know the Second Wives Head Quarters and Community is going to be an amazing touchstone and forum for everyone out there who is part of a blended family.
There is also a stigma attached to being the second wife and stepparent. I want to see the stigma start to dissolve, and in it’s place more empathy for what the second wife is really trying to achieve. Most second wives I meet are doing the absolute best they can, for the good of the family. They are working hard to bring harmony into their family and a sense of normality. The thought of the second wife driving a wedge between everyone is not necessarily the case. If anything, they are the one’s bringing the family together. So, why are we looked upon as second-class citizens? The second wife and stepparent is here to stay, she is you and I, and we are part of the village, whether other’s like it or not.
This book and the community for me, has never been about bashing the first wife and proving anyone wrong, or making people accountable. This is a mission and a purpose to show the world that the second wife and stepparent deserves more respect and understanding. To help my fellow second wives realize that you can be the hero in your blended family. Sometimes it takes one person raising the white flag and saying sorry, I surrender, even if you have done nothing wrong! It’s about being the bigger person, looking at it from an aerial point of view, and staying above the drama. Always looking for ways to create peace and harmony, even when you are dodging bullets and landmines.
What is your Why? Why did you decide to marry a man that has been married before or has children from a previous relationship? Why are you putting yourself through all this? Why not run for the hills, and find someone else, without all the baggage? If it’s because you love your partner and genuinely want the best for your family. Then now is the time to put your big girl pants on, and get out there and fight for what you want.
I believe in you! And I am right beside you all the way. You can get through this, and you can have the life and the family you desire. The Second Wives Community is going to change many lives for the good! Stay connected and always remember -you are second to none!